Friday already?

Well, since I wrote on Monday, I can hardly be surprised but wow, how quickly time flies.

I've been particularly triggered this past week with the news and the SCOTUS mess and the idea of character and how yes, we all make mistakes but maybe SCOTUS needs to be exemplary? And how maybe some spots are hard to get out, hard to change? (i.e. can a leopard change his/her spots?) Sorry, felt the need to spell that one out. Sometimes I make obscure references. But also, Shakespeare, Othello, right? (Out out damn spot)

And I remember those high school days, too. And I'm glad women are speaking out and telling their stories. Will things change *this* time? All we want is some equality, some respect, the ability to earn a living, to be recognized for our contributions, our talents, our intellect, to not feel as if we need to do everyone's emotional laundry, all the cleaning, all the sorting. 

I think about the importance of mothers, of teachers. How can you instill values? And what if in a two parent home, the parents have different values? I think too much, that's obvious. And sometimes the weight of the world is heavy and too much to bear. But then someone or something makes me laugh heartedly and things dissipate until the next time. And so on.

We saw the movie "Dawn Wall" about the first free climb up the Dawn Wall of Yosemite. It's fascinating and amazing how much internal drive + external support was evident. Tommy Caldwell's wife willingly allowed him to spend so much time climbing, even with a little baby. Not many men would do the same thing, or so it seems.

The weather has been uncomfortably hot here, as most places. That has really gotten me down. The idea of conservation only really works if *everyone* gets on board and some people are so freakishly selfish and full of hatred. Zero Population Growth. Why is that such a hard thing to swallow? It goes back to some of my core considerations, like, how much is enough? Years ago I wrote a song with the chorus, "Too much is not enough, too much is not enough, too much is not enough for you."

And I can be guilty of that as well, as I look directly into my maker studio and see all the supplies that I have--though to be honest, I am trying to use them up. For a long time I've tried to not buy any more supplies--though it's hard. I do have plenty of leather, fabric, findings (that means things like metal hardware, zippers, etc) and my challenge to myself is to try to use what I have to make something of value that I can sell to fund my other creative endeavors like music. 

I guess it's greed and some people being so uncomfortable with examining their own shortcomings that they want to overpower the entire conversation so that they can avoid doing the reckoning and feel the deep grief that comes with repentance. But, again, at what cost? 

--aside for anyone who used to live in NYC, remember Cost/Revs? That graffiti? 

I guess, on the flip side, there are some women who are so fed up with the Patriarchy and the Misogyny that they want to "burn it all down," so maybe we do need to "burn it all down" but, and this is the awareness that Environmentalists have, burning the environment will be extremely painful. Water wars. Sometimes I think about this when the tap runs. 

Back to family values, I come from a much more strident conservation background than my husband, and my entreaties to save water go nowhere with him because he says that our water comes from a well, and whatever we flush down the drain goes back into the ground and then (eventually, but how many years???) back into the system. 

BUT, there is a new factory in our vicinity and this factory uses some ungodly amount of water per day, like close to 1,000,000 gallons of water, and so then I'm reminded of the scene in "There Will Be Blood" where Daniel Day Lewis says, "We drink your milkshake" 

For all my father's faults, and they were many and some were extreme, he did raise us to be aware of our resources, whether they be financial, elemental, or physical/material. I wouldn't say he was miserly, but more like Bill Cunningham, who famously rejected the trappings of "the rich" (though at the end of his life, my father did really enjoy driving a Lexus--until the Prius came out and he bought  that, because, and yea, yes, gas milage.)

Sometimes character is not obvious. But character is something that doesn't cost anything to acquire, necessarily, and something to be proud of. A good, admirable character, that is.

have a great week,




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